I Hate Waiting

My wife and I love the movie, "The Princess Bride."  We quote it to each other more often that we'd like to admit, but that is where the title of this post comes from.  It's also because it is an unfortunate reality in my life.  I hate to wait for anything.  In this world of instant gratification, I am the lead dog at times.  We live in a world where information is just a click away.  Scores, highlights, important events, stock prices, fast food, headlines...you name it, we can find it or get it within 5 minutes or less.  Unfortunately, it has spilled over into my faith as well.  There was a time in my life when I looked for what a church could do for me, especially in college. If a church was having a lunch on Sunday for college students, I was there.  The part I struggle with now is that I want God to give me answers to my questions and prayers now.

Here is where I'm beginning to realize something.  God was teaching me something today that just hit me square between the eyes.  I read the first few chapters of Ezra (yep, Ezra) and God began to show me something.  First of all, for those that might need a refresher (I did), Ezra began by chronicling the Jews release from Babylon.  Cyrus issued a decree allowing them to return to their land and rebuild the temple.  The Jews had been in captivity for 60-70 years, just as Jeremiah had prophesied.  I don't know about you, but if I had been in captivity for 70 years, I would begin to doubt if I would ever get out, even if Jeremiah had said so.  Here is where God hit me with some reality...it's in the waiting where we learn the most.  Now, that may be a simple truth, but I'm beginning to try and unpack what that looks like in my life.  

First of all, what happens when I ask God for something?  I wait for a few seconds for a response and then move on.  Do I honestly think that giving God a few seconds at the end of my laundry list of requests allows Him to speak to me?  I almost think God wants us to work for our answers.  In the discomfort of waiting, that is when I need to seek Him all the more.  I need to seek solitude and silence to be able to hear from God.  At some point, I need to disconnect from my normal routine to allow God to have room to speak to me.  All to often I find that my schedule drives my day, and, unfortunately, I don't schedule God first, I try to fit Him in when I can.  Thankfully, that is beginning to change.  The more that I make my time with God a priority, the more I clearly hear His voice.  

The next thing that happens when I ask God for something is that I look for answers in everything.  If I hear a song, I wonder if God is trying to answer my prayer through it.  If I read a book, watch a movie, listen to a sermon, no matter what it is, I try to make that event the answer to my prayer.  Sometimes, God does use those mediums to speak to me, but the more I seek after Him, the more I begin to realize that God speaks to me through His Word more than anything else.  If He uses one of those other things, He always backs it up with His Word.  So, obviously, if I'm not in His Word, then I don't hear Him very clearly, if at all.  Gelaina and I both believe that distraction is one of the main tools that Satan uses to keep us from doing exactly what God wants us to do.  Satan doesn't play fair!  He distracts me by using the very same mediums.  He leads me to believe that God is telling me to do something, when the reality is the exact opposite.  As my Pastor, Steve, said on Sunday, we need to know what our Heavenly Father's voice sounds like.

The last thing that happens when I ask God for something is that as I begin to do what He tells me to do, I don't rely on Him to see it to completion.  Instead, I take the wheel and say, "I'll take it from here."  Things start going well and I begin to slowly think that I have things under control.  It's then, that God says, "alright, take your shot."  After which, I fail miserably and have to start the cycle over again...you'd think I'd learn by now.  However, I realize now, as I have begun to allow God to control every aspect of my life, it's so much easier to say, "God, you take it from here."  When I do, I realize that His response to me is, "I thought you'd never ask."